Sunday, December 20, 2009


Today I was asked my first and last name for the roster, and my mom told the woman that I was her daughter. The woman said that I could've had a different last name, and my mom said,'not yet'.

The woman said, 'Congratulations'.

I said,'Um, thanks...."

then the woman says--Make sure you do it right the first time. Trust me--I'm on my FOURTH. I was with my first for 11 years, and there were times we were literally about to kill each other. No kidding - I held a pistol up to his head, and the only thing that kept me from pulling the trigger was the idea of my son growing up with his only parent in a German prison. This one I've been with for 25 years, so....(grin)

Friday, December 18, 2009

Awake, Dream, Awake

I COULD NOT go to sleep last night
My mind was being too active
I'd turn toss toss turn

But I eventually DID fall asleep
because I dreamed, but somehow I knew it was a dream (?)
The President was visiting, and there was a receiving line
and in that line was various members of my family, with animals
a snake when to attack my dad, and he kicked it, and it flew at me, and I woke up
at 3 am

I got myself up about 7:30 to attempt to get me back on schedule

Friday, December 4, 2009


Morning by Morning I wake up to find
the power and comfort of God's hand in mine
Season by season, I watch Him, amazed,
in awe of the mystery of His perfect ways

All I have need of
His hand will provide
He's always been faithful to me

I can't remember a trial or a pain
He did not recycle to bring me gain
I can't remember one single regret
in serving God only, and trusting His hand

All I have need of
His hand will provide
He's always been faithful to me

This is my anthem, this is my song
The theme of the stories I've heard for so long
God has been faithful; He will be again
His loving compassion, it knows no end

All I have need of
His hand will provide
He's always been faithful
He's always been faithful
He's always been faithful to me

"He's always been faithful" Sara Groves

To wait is painful; it goes against the humanness of instant gratification.
I want to fidget, to squirm, to get my hands into things, probably to cause mischief...

But I am told to "BE STILL", to "WAIT ON THE LORD"
so I empty my pockets and my heart at the altar,
and try not to pick my things back up
(Empty hands can catch gifts better)
Regardless of what I am given
it will be The Best Thing
For He's always been faithful to me.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009


If you smoke, stop - It's better for you, and makes less work for me.

I had a patient yesterday, has smoked for 60 years. Came into the hospital because she couldn't breathe. She kept trying to get outta bed by herself. Her blood count was low, so she needed blood, and it took MUCH convincing to get her to agree to it. Her breathing was so bad, we had to put her on a machine that forced air into her lungs and gave her anxiety medicine so she could tolerate it.

The lung doc asked-do you smoke?
Gonna quit?

THEN, the patient states - I don't know WHY I'm here
Lung doc says - well, you have pneumonia on top of your lung disease, and you have lung disease because of your smoking
pt- well, I'm not gonna quit smoking

I had to send her to the ICU at shift change last night....

I found out yesterday that this person was intubated that night, and died the next day.