I've been thinking about this for awhile - Wants vs. Needs
and I think sometimes our 'wants' can get in the way of the 'best thing' (aka 'need'). Sure, it's good to have an idea of preferences, but there needs to be some flexibility. I think of my brother and sister-in-law = his 'wants' in a woman were, among other things, 'tall' and 'musically inclined/singer'. My sister-in-law is not tall, and while she greatly enjoys music, does not have the best ear. I think it took him awhile to realize this was the woman for him - that she is a 'need' in his life.
At 28, being a nurse in Indiana and single never would've made the list of possibilites. And that's why God knows better than me. Sometimes I wonder 'why', but I know there are things in play I don't know about yet, or may never know. I try to 'want' the 'best things' - to TRUST the path I'm on and the God that creates my itinerary. Being single really can suck. It makes my heart ache, and I once again get to take those aches back to God. I know that I'm getting practice that makes perfect, as God is the only one that can help soothe those hurts. My favorite thought in those moments is that there IS someone, and that for some reason, they aren't ready yet. That man is currently working through trials and struggles with God, and that some day, our paths of life may merge. My worst thought is that 'singleness is the end' - which is a very self-centered thought that brings about a torrent of emotions. It makes me fearful, and opens up parts of my heart that I hold close and tight, and need to be given back to God , so that He will do what He wants with them. If singleness is to always be mine, I would hope to be like the character in 'The Great Divorce', about whom they say that she was a parent to every child she met, and that when men met her, that just interacting with her made them go love their families and be better fathers and husbands.
I know what I 'want', but God knows what I 'need'; He holds 'the best things' and He will win out so long as I can get out of my own way.